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Goldfish · 2026
Royally Unbothered
Not everyone dresses up to be judged. This is a black telescope-eye fantail goldfish, all bulging saucer eyes, a sculpted wrinkled head, and fins that trail like ceremonial robes. Across the set it turns for the camera, flares its veil-like fins into a full black halo, then swims off with one enormous eye still fixed on the lens — equal parts deep-sea alien and disapproving aristocrat who never asked to be photographed.
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Package price $38.25 — you save $6.75 (15%) vs buying all 5 individually.
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